I want to whine. I can't stand whining. My daughter whines and it's one of the only things that makes me want to slap her. I don't, of course, but if I were the sort to slap? Whining would be the reason.
I want to whine about not having any friends. but wait...I do have friends, both elsewhere and here. The elsewhere ones are better friends, simply because I've known them longer. Which is, of course, the only remedy for having better friends here. and yes, I KNOW I've whined about this before. But then I read a blog written by a friend of a friend - who I'd like to get to know better, she's quite nice - talking about what a good friend the mutual friend is (got that?) and I get all mopey and whiny. Because that particular mutual friend I sometimes don't understand. While we are together she is so nice, and seems to genuinely want to be my friend too. But she doesn't call me, and lately hasn't seemed to want to get together, though she says she does. however, disclaimer, she is pregnant, and while I was pregnant, I had a hard time making an effort to be social too. a very hard time, for reasons I don't understand. so she could be like me. or she could just be not wanting to hurt my feelings? or I could be taking all this WAY TOO PERSONALLY like usual?!?! I don't want to talk to her about it, because I don't want to be whiny and all self-centered like I am being now.
She lives about 40 minutes away, which I don't mind driving, but is too far to call her up and reasonably expect to be able to say "hey, come hang out a bit" and I don't want to invite myself over there, we haven't reached that part of friendship yet. I miss that part of living in Pullman, where I could call Andrea and be all "yeah, so I'm coming over, okay? thought I'd hang out at your house all day" and that would be totally fine with her and I would know it was totally fine with her.
I would have to say this is the ONLY THING I am not liking about living here. Mike loves his job, Kaia loves her school, my family is very happy. I love having my husband available in the evenings to be with his family, I love being with my kids and not having to worry about rushing off to work. I enjoy being able to take the time to cook healthy yummy meals for us, and my marriage is joyful.
But I need other wimminfolk! I want to have friends who can bring their kids over and hang out, we can make lunch together and chat about nothing and everything. and I want it now. I know, I KNOW. good friendships don't happen right away, they grow. but one, just one, good friend would be good to have right now. one that lives close by, one that I can call up and go grocery shopping with.
okay, whine over.