Bittersweet moment

Kaia asked to sleep with us tonight. She's getting too big to sleep with us all night very often. Those of you with kids will understand when I say how strange it is how much SPACE on a bed a child takes up!

I agreed she could sleep with me until Mike came to bed. She snuggled in and held my thumbs, something we've done since she was very small, and it was the only way I could make her stay still long enough to go to sleep. Her hands have grown so much in the last few years. Soon she won't be able to hold just my thumbs.

I've always liked having her sleep with us. In sleep, she is so innocent, so snuggly. I've made sure she is able to sleep on her own, but those times that she climbs into bed and cuddles up are in my list of favorite moments.

Tonight, I smiled while hugging her close, thinking of how our family is going to grow.

Then I stop smiling. Because a baby in the bed will mean an end, at night at least, of a Kaia in the bed. This is so sad.

It will be the end of an era. The era of Only-Childness for Kaia. She has been looking forward to a baby sister or brother for literally YEARS. For a five year old, that is a LONG time. I remember when one of the kids in her preschool had a small baby sister or brother on the way. For weeks, Kaia would come home and glare at my belly. "Do you have a baby in your tummy YET!?" she would demand of me, anxious I get started on this wonderful thing called a baby. "No," I would tell her, grinning happily at her enthusiasm.

We will tell her tomorrow. and she will be thrilled. She will dream of all the fun things she can do with her baby sister or brother. She has already happily set aside toys and clothes for the future baby. She learns new skills, only to proudly declare that now she can "zip up my baby's coat for her!"

She has no idea that there will be days she will hate having another child in the house. another small person that her parents love as much as they love her.

I never wanted to have an only child. I think brothers and sisters are one of this world's not-to-be-missed joys. I wouldn't give mine up for all the emeralds in the world.

I hope she continues to feel the same. 6 years apart....they won't be close friends. They won't go through any school together. But I hope they find that bond, between siblings.

Holy shit. I'm gonna have two kids. My sister has a 12-year old step-son. My brother is about to be a daddy.

When did I become an adult? When did they?

This is turning out to be a WONDERFUL year.

let the ride begin....

I'm pregnant! I had some abdominal pain Thursday night, and called my clinic for advice. The doctor on call wanted me to take a pregnancy test to rule out an ectopic pregnancy. (a tubal pregnancy). I took a test, and it came out positive, so I went into the ER. The tests were all inconclusive either way, so they kept me overnight. In the morning, they were STILL inconclusive, though the doctor was fairly sure it was not a tubal, since I had no more pain. However, they kept me all day Friday just to be sure. Some of the hormone levels were not rising as fast as expected for a normal pregnancy, so I had to go back in today for more blood work. The results just came back, and everything looks great!!!

My doctor hasn't given me a due date, but according to the Internet (lol), my due date is October 17th.

We haven't told Kaia yet. We're going to buy her a "I'm a Big Sister" T-shirt and let her read it to find out.

Though this was a bit earlier than we had anticipated for another child, we're really excited! We'll keep ya'll updated as the months go on.....



This part really should be it's own post, but gonna add it here.


Andrea came Thursday night to be with me in the hospital. She stayed with me all night, and all day the next day. I wasn't released until around 9 pm on Friday night. She was with me the whole time. I would have been climbing the walls without her, since most of my time there was waiting, waiting, and more waiting.

Thank you, Andrea, for being there. It meant SO MUCH to me.

just send good vibes my way, k?

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stay tuned.......
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coffee is good in the morning...or anytime, really.

It's early. I haven't been getting Mike up to exercise, he's been working so hard. His interview for an internship with MS is next Friday. and he has so much homework! I cannot wait for the days we can go to bed at the same time!

I've been keeping up with the 7 o'clock wake up time, but not so much the 6. However, I have been waking up before my alarm clock goes off! My body is adjusting quite nicely.

I need to do taxes, we could really use the return. Having that little extra after financial aid was so nice! I can't wait until we can live like that all the time! I don't need to be rich, but having enough to spend when I want to will be nice. Shearing day will help, should make at least $100. grocery money! yay! :-)

Not much to say today. everything is flowing along.

Dana brought me coffee day before yesterday at work as a surprise. It was so sweet, and I hadn't had any coffee that morning, either, so was being so good at not buying any! She even remembered what I drink!

She and I are doing some online scrapbooking classes the last weekend in February! She's really good at scrapbooking, very talented. Hopefully some will rub off on me. I am getting the scrapbooking bug again....organized my bin last night. Next time my mom and dad drive up, I need to remind them to bring the paper Tania got me for Christmas. every color in the rainbow, 500 sheets! I can't wait to have it up here!


everything I think of to write is pretty mundane. I think I'll sign off for now....

oh! Jason is back! I can't wait to hear all about his trip! Welcome back Jason! back is relative, of course...considering he's back in Kuwait....

YONINDID is my favorite...

Kaia had a "spelling test" today. It was really a test of how well they sounded out words, not if they got them right. Here's Kaia's.......


MONSTR- monster
YONINDID- united
Dres- dress
BOTem- bottom
HIC-hike
eGL- eagle
CLOsb- closed
BMT- bumped
TiP- type
See- see

HemeN--?? She can't remember. Any ideas?

A little bit of design in an otherwise un-organized house

I like the top of my stove. a bit silly, yes, but a small step in the direction of having a house that doesn't look like it's been decorated by ......going blank...umm...decorated by someone who....doesn't know how to decorate? doesn't have the space or money to decorate? or have a house "style" if that makes sense? anyway....I like it. The mortar and pestle is actaully used, yes. The red tea is called "Tea for the Queen of Hearts" and has REAL rose buds in it. The salt and pepper shakers are one of my favorite things, funnily enough, and the chopsticks are from my Aunt Carol, who brought them from China! The Ulu is from our Alaskan cruise.

this and that

Kai is standing in the corner. For the second time in two minutes. I swear, you wanna make those people who kidnap people and then hold them hostage give up? Put a couple of whiny 5 year olds in front. Amplify them. I give the kidnappers 5 minutes. Maybe. Then they'll be coming out with their hands up, begging to be taken somewhere that is child-free.

anyway. It's a quiet day today. There were a couple possibilities in the air, but we are just staying home today. Might be a good idea, since the next two weekends are full.

Next weekend I'm helping to skirt fleeces again, for two days this time. Skirting fleeces is this: you stand around a table type thing, and someone (last year it was me, was quite fun!) brings the freshly taken-off-the-sheep fleece and flings it expertly (unless you are me, though I became fairly good at it after a few hours) flat on the table. Then everyone starts taking bits of VM (doesn't that sound nasty? it actually means vegetable matter) and poopy bits off the fleece. The "skirting" comes from how you take off the bits around the edges of the fleece, I think. It's hard work, even though you are just standing there. Also, it's COLD, and though you can wear gloves, the wool sticks to the gloves, so I decided it was easier to go bare handed. The lanolin makes your hands all greasy and warm. We start early, 6:45, so I'll be spending both Friday and Saturday nights at Andrea's. Last year, we did 90 sheep, I think....and it took 12 hours. This year, there are many more sheep, not sure, but I think like 160? Andrea? So we'll most likely be doing it for two days. Sore muscles, here we come. It's good though. afterward, you really feel like you've accomplished something, done something useful.

The weekend after, my mom is coming for a visit. Kaia is uber-excited, and I always love her visits. She and I are really close, and we have a blast. This time, we get to talk about the soon to come addition to our family! and maybe do a bit of baby stuff shopping!!! yes, it's early, but hey, it's FUN.

Dana had invited Kaia and I out to her place today, but the snow fall last night put the kaput on that idea. It would have been a lot of fun, and I am really excited about getting to know her better.

Then I was thinking about going with Andrea and John up to Spokane, where John will be watching the Super Bowl. (quick side story. John called yesterday to see if Mike wanted to go. He said "I'm assuming you want to watch the game." Mike said "what game?" He actually does enjoy watching football, he's just not that into it otherwise) I decided that I wanted to just have a quiet time here, though. Will put away some laundry later, and maybe work on organizing my scrap booking bin.

Kaia is watching Mary Poppins. I haven't ever really liked it, for one reason. When the children talk about how they went into the chalk drawing, and rode horses, Mary Poppins actually gets mad at them for making stuff up. Seems wrong. Also, the little boy has a rotten tooth, which bugs me. I do like the chimney sweep dance and song though.

I took a picture of my stove top today. Seems silly, but I like how I have it set up. Will post it later.

So many things changing lately. Became friends with Jason (he comes back today! yay! can talk to him online again!), met Dana, and we seem to be soul sisters, and a new baby niece or nephew on the way. Andrea picked her career, being a farrier, which she will excel at, I know. Mike will be graduating in less than a year. We'll be moving soon after. Then even more huge changes! I won't be working, will be hopefully raising another baby and going to school. Mike will be working, doing what he loves- software development.

Life is good. I am so very lucky in so many ways. Thank you, universe. I am happy.

I am content.