in the car, yesterday

Kaia: "When I grow up, I'm going to pretend to be a boy."
Me: "interesting."
Kaia: "But I won't tell my wife. I won't ever show her my ...you know...that way she'll never know I'm not a boy."
Me: "ummm...huh..."
Kaia: "then when she dies, I'll be a girl again."
Me: ".............."

Little Man

Ben's cognitive abilities are crazy growing! For the last couple of nights, we've done "best part of the day" at dinner. Here are the things he said:

Last night--

me: "Ben, what was the best part of your day? Something good that happened today?"
Ben: "Armwarmers!" His granny had knitted him some armwarmers, and he had worn them most of the day. I thought it was very cool that he understood the conversation and the point of the topic!

Tonight--

me: "Ben, what was the best part of today for you? What happened that was fun? "
Ben: "Going Katie" We went over to a friend's house, her daughter is also 2, and is named Katie. he loves playing with her!

this is why I am heading to the asylum when Mike gets home

here is the completely un-exaggerated conversation that happens whenever Kaia is supposed to be doing a chore--and this is the very short, simple one of putting clothes from the washer into the dryer.....


me: "Are your clothes ready to be put into the dryer?"
her: "I don't know." (continues playing)
me: "Check, please."
her: SIGH. wanders toward the garage. gets distracted, starts playing.
me: "clothes, Kaia."
her: "I am!" opens garage door, heads out.
five minutes later...
her: coming out of garage singing to herself. wanders around.
me: "were they ready to be put into the dryer?"
her: "oh! I don't know..." wanders back into the garage.
five minutes later...
her: coming out of garage "I don't know where a laundry basket is"
me: in my room, dump the dirty clothes in front of the washer and use it for the clean ones"
her: dragging the hamper through the living room, gets distracted showing Ben how to take care of his baby.
me: "clothes, Kaia!"
her: "Ben doesn't know how to take care of his baby! I care about babies, don't you!?!!?"
me: " not pretend ones when you are supposed to be doing chores."
her: "MOM!! that's horrible that you don't care about babies!!!"
me: "CLOTHES, KAIA!"
her: "OKAY!" drags hamper into garage
TEN minutes later, comes out of garage
me: "where are the clean ones from the dryer?"
her: "oh, right...." wanders back into garage, comes out dragging a hamper with clean clothes. I hear no dryer sounds.
me: "did you start the dryer?"
her: "no, I haven't put my clothes in yet!"
me: " leave that here, go do so."
her: "okay" wanders back into garage.
a LONG TIME later...she comes back out
her: "can you help me? It's hard."
me: "no, you can do it. NOW GO DO SO!!"
her: "I have a stomach ache"
me: "I'm sorry to hear that. After you put your clothes into the dryer, you can rest."
her: moaning as she goes back in..."you don't even care that I'm sick!"
A VERY LONG TIME later...she comes back out.
her: "THERE. I'm DONE."
me: "remember to take this hamper into my room, please"
her: GROAN, MOAN, WHIMPER "but my TUMMY HURTS!"
me: "just do it"

she takes the hamper in, limping and moaning. coming back out...

her: "am I done now?"
me: "yes, finally"
here: "BEN!! let's play now!!" and runs off.